Ground of My Being

Happy Full Moon!

I am an Aries baby, a spring sprout and I LOVE this season. I like autumn as well, and aspects of summer, IF I am in nature, and winter finds me snuggled in with my cats reading, or at the beach enjoying the stormy sea from the shore. Ah, but Spring! It is in my blood, it IS my blood as far as I am concerned. My birthday is Tuesday! A great present to me is that my Esalen (TM) course will be over on the 30th and not a day too soon. A week later and I begin my Acupressure training, about which I am elated. The weather has cheered up since earlier this week, and perhaps will remain fabulous while I spend Sunday and Monday near ZuZu Land (otherwise knowns as Marin County, specifically on this trip Muir Woods and Stinson Beach).

I wanted to have a birthday party, but the weather makes it difficult unless I have it inside, and I really want to have it outside in the park. But there were complications regarding getting all my people together at one time and so I decided on yet another year of a private celebration. I may still have a gathering though, in April.

I can't tell if it is simply because of my birthday, or the great weather, or the season that I feel a profound sense of renewal and vitality. I am really high on whatever the energy is. I also had a really great massage yesterday. Mind you, I don't really find massages as fabulous as many people do, I prefer "energy work" like Reiki or Acupressure. But the woman who worked on me was born at Esalen and her mother taught her the style, and she represents the very best of what Esalen massage has to offer. My personal belief is that the $150 I spent for 1.5 hour session would give me 10 yoga classes after which I would feel energized and relaxed, and be improving my physical self from the inside out, and for me, be a better use of my money.

Onto another topic. I've decided that I really want to buy some land. I don't necessarily need or want a house of my own now, although that desire isn't out of the question, but I've been revisiting my love of having some land, and not just some quarter acre thing, but 5 or 15 or 20! The idea being not to develop it very much at all, but help to keep wild places wild. I can visualize having some land that on my days off I drive up to and camp out on and little by little figure out a way to possibly have a living space that is integral with the land. This may start out as me living in a tipi, (stop giggling Zuzu!). I would really like this, a lot. As this is MY fantasy, I can build it any way I like, and I saw some parcels in Point Arena, Mendocino County for $150k that would suit me. Close to the ocean and yet having the weather I like, foggy and overcast often.

Now that went to the tipi website, I think I might get a child's tipi and set it up in my backyard to have as a mini retreat. Hmmmmm. Well so, anyway, these are the things on my mind.

Here is the beginning of a personal statement of being that I've been putting together, I read it every morning, I am still adding to it and refining it:

My name Cassie. I assert it in the joy in my being. I live in vitality and joy. My glowing integrity identifies me here on earth. I accept the vitality of my being. I speak my own name, Cassie, which has been given to me in this space and time. My integrity, my strength and my beauty identifies me here, and for all time. I assert the vitality of my being. I live on earth in my full glory and strength.

The energy that comes through me as my vitality, is inexhaustible. The vitality that I know as my own surges up through my being. I choose the time of my birth and death.

I trust the ground of my being. As I trust the ground of my being, my being within nature, myself as a daughter of the earth, I know that I am sustained. I am embarked upon an adventure. I am growing like a new brand of tree from the earth. I am embarked upon a fine adventure, all based within the ground of my being. I trust the ground of my being to support me. I submit to my own nature, and find my freedom. Like the flower submits to the sun, and the ground submits to rain. I have no need to defend myself. My own vibrant reality exists, regardless of anything I project upon it. I feel my own energy. My ecstacy and my understanding are equal to my being, and I recognize the self that I am, and I shall not run, because I shall know the ground of my being.

I am joyfully myself. As I trust in the ground of my being, I share in the joy of my own being and trust myself. Trust that what comes from me is good, and adds to the universe. I trust in the integrity of my blood, and the molecule. I trust that I am here for a reason.

My being is one of expansion, not of limitation. When I catch myself thinking in limitations, I remember the spider who knows that her corner beneath the stairs, is sacred. So is my corner of the universe. I fulfill it. I do not deny my body its joy, or my mind its strentgh, or my feelings their fulfillment. My beliefs form my idea of reality. I let loose my beliefs as if I were a woman with wild purple hair blowing in the wind. I trust in the ground of my being. I feel its strength. I am not afraid of my own energy, it will not hurt anyone, it is trustworthy. It is the same energy which makes flowers grow, and stars as well. The same energy to which the spider, and squirel respond. I allow myself my own joy.