reeking havoc

The weekend started looking not so good about Tuesday of last week. I kept thinking that it was all in my head, and to just keep going, it's not like there was anything specific I was getting, just a general feeling. Mars and Pluto are retrograde and maybe that has something to do with it. I wasn't in a bad mood or anything, in fact I've delevloped a humor about me which I appreciate though I think I let it make me be too easy on the world and I didn't listen to my intuition enough.

I feel a definite bump up in my psychic sensitivity since the Camino. Since I've been back there have been a number of very specific incidents that glare as examples to me: people I've thought of and suddenly i see them that day; being in a movie theater that I never go to wondering if I'll see someone there I know (why??) and seeing my uncle who doesn't even live here. And there's more. Finding a place to live and feeling somewhere in the back of me that although i keep saying 'yes' I know, feel that I'm not going to be moving in, but i can't see why so i don't listen, sweep the feeling under the rug because on the practical level I need a place to live and this is (seems) the only option right now.

Only option or not, the truth unravels in the end, and indeed I am not moving in. So I look at myself and laugh, and wonder what it is that I've created on my horizon that I created the not moving in thing. I know it is a cool home, a neat place and it coulf very well be the cottage in Mill Valley. I've created the time to save the money and the time for it to become available.

add to that a class i didn't mean to take this weekend, it came up suddenly and I didn't really want to do it but I said yes and now one day into it and I'm going to not go the second day, today. A weekend of bad timeings and hilarious cosmic riotous reflections on the crazy energy. Am I lying to myself, should I muddle through the class, I don't have the energy to, the patience to. I feel that I made the psychic decisions already, the expectation has been set and I think I'll only be frustrated if go.

And somehow i knew days ago that I wasn't going to go today.

Smells like cosmic havoc (in the funniest ways).